So, it’s been well over a month since I last posted on here and it was time that I really needed to be able to sort myself out because life really came at me hard and personally I thought it was rude. I’m still in the process of doing my own searching of ‘finding myself’ but I felt like I should write about what the last few weeks have taught me I guess.
Fear Is Me
I don’t know if it’s just me, but I feel as though fear has so much control over my life right now. All this fear I’ve been feeling recently had me scared to try completing my goals, scared to commit and just scared to find out who I am. I feel like this is a feeling that a lot of people may be able to relate to, whether it’s been in the past or now. In my first post, I spoke about using this year to be able to find out who you want to be and becoming disciplined enough to be able to achieve the goals you set for yourself. Honestly, I started the year so motivated, ready to tap into my potential and make a name for myself. After January went by, I started to look at my list of goals and I started to think that I was overshooting, and the goals just became a lot more unrealistic to me to the point where I just dismissed them and started to just exist rather than live. I showed my goals to a friend of mine, and when he reads this, I know he’s going to smile, but he helped to remind me that all my goals were very achievable and that he was even willing to help me day by day to get there. This ‘fear of failure’ that I had been feeling was so constant and overpowering that I had started doubting myself and started to cloud my vision and dreams until I felt like I wasn’t going to get to where I wanted to be so there was no point investing the time into myself.
Life Is Tough
I feel like if you were to put fear on a spectrum there would be 2 extremes of it, it can either drive us to live or just survive. In this life we live, it is tough and that’s something I’ve been saying daily as a response to my own and other people’s problems, ‘life is tough’. Yes, it is, but do we really want to be living this life to just end up not being satisfied with what we’ve done or not be happy? If that’s the case, then what’s the point?
Life is about having an ‘all or nothing’ mentality, so even if you feel like quitting DON’T. You should be doing things for you and your own success. Right now, I have a few people that I want to make proud and that’s because they’ve taken the time to make sure I stay on my feet and support me on my journey this year despite the little mood swings I may have from time to time.
For a fact, I know 2019 probably hasn’t gone the way that all of us had planned for it, but we’ve only just entered March. There is still time to make the necessary changes if need be. If you feel like you’ve hit a wall, rather than giving up, just stop, think and change direction. If Plan A doesn’t work, then keep going till you reach Plan Z. If that doesn’t work, then you may need to keep making up new letters till you find the approach that works.
If you have goals and you think you can’t achieve them, don’t sell yourself short. Like me, you may want to achieve but fear the obstacles you think you may have to face even though you haven’t even got there yet. If this is your current mindset, you’re just going to be keeping yourself in a constant void of pain because of your fear of failure. To avoid pain, is to avoid growth. It’s just a case where you must become more diligent and take time.
Lesson 3: Patience Is A Virtue
There is no need to try rush your blessings, just breathe and pace yourself. Everyone’s success will come at different times so avoid comparing your success to other people’s because everyone’s moving at different speeds in life. Some people can run the whole time, but you may need to walk for a long time before you can even start jogging. In time, you will receive everything you deserve.
Psalm 27: 13-14 (GNT) – “I know that I will live to see the Lord’s goodness in this present life. Trust in the Lord. Have faith, do not despair. Trust in the Lord.”
Aj is a talented blogger, writer and spoken word artist. Read more from AJ at trialsandtribulationsonline.wordpress.com
We look forward to more posts from her – pleased to have her part of the RealTalk Family!
Find her also on Twitter: @cxcoaj and Instagram @trialsandtrubulationsonline